An Orgy through this Bum's eyes
Fellow bums. I was burning the midnight oil last night covering the election. Man am I tired! What a twist, Ted Cruz drops out, Donald Trump wins big, the lovely, beautiful, sexy, stunning Hillary Clinton loses, and much like when I pee, Indiana was feeling the Bern.
Last week I had the pleasure of joining other bums at our 1st Annual Cigar Bum Orgy held at CIGARfest. It was incredible! While none of our female members were able to attend, you know BrianWilliams loves a good sausage fest! Reminds me of the good ol' days of newsroom reporting. The Anchorman is a very accurate portrayal of our life in the 70s, except we oiled each other up and didn't really chase the ladies like they do in that movie.
While I was only able to attend the Orgy for one day (and stay one evening), it has given me a boner that won't go away to this day.
The Cigars International Hamburg store is phenomenal! What a great location for an Orgy.
I had met a few of the bums during our interviews for my Exclusive! Bum of the Month interviews, but let me say meeting
@lvfcrook1503
in person was as scary as you would imagine meeting a real life Italian gangster. Luckily I've had experience reporting Live! from helicopters being shot at during a war, so I was able to maintain my professional demeanor. I've never met a bigger Drew Estate whore in my life! I put a Liga wrapper on a Mark Twain cigar and gave to Jimmy. I told him it was an exclusive NBC Nightly News Liga30Rock edition. He promptly smoked it and proclaimed it's greatness. What a chump!
@Horseshoe
is as advertised. If you can imagine a hillbilly country bumpkin who flips bourbon and moonshine and won't name his son Boner because he's whipped by his baby momma, well, there you have Brent.
Like other bums, I was disappointed to find
@04EDGE40
to be a skinny, diminutive, white guy with an affinity for deep V-necks that showed off just enough of this chest, but not his actual nipples, instead of the individual in his profile picture. What a tease! Though, as you'll see later, Collin accepted me with open arms and a gentle love that gives me chills to this day.
@Demuths1770
is an interesting and strange case. While I enjoyed my conversation with him, he wouldn't stop taking selfies on his phone! He must have taken 218 in the time I was there alone. Unfortunately the one selfie I wanted him to take at the urinal, he wouldn't. Kyle told me that "the camera takes away a couple of inches. You're in television, don't you know that?" I didn't have the heart to tell him that the camera adds 15 pounds, it doesn't take away inches of your penis in a picture.
@penna stogey
brought a delicious gift of local cuisine to DogRockets, who then shared some with me. Wow! His homemade phallic shaped deer sausages really got my motor running. You are a thoughtful and kind bum with a flair for erotic, hand-crafted meats.
@DogRockets
is of course a gentlemen and a scholar, as his posts on the bum indicate. Rarely am I in awe when meeting someone, but he had me speechless. With a love for Gurkha and a passion for life that is intoxicating, he is truly remarkable.
I wish I could have stayed at the Orgy for it's entire duration, but alas, my journalism called and I had to leave Thursday morning before more bums arrived. Perhaps next year!
Here are a couple of pictures that my camera crew was able to capture the magic in.
http://i1362.photobucket.com/albums/...psodijyouw.jpg
http://i1362.photobucket.com/albums/...ps8uqdkti6.jpg
Stay smokey cigar bum!
