Pipe Quotation Contest

[Tobias Lutz]

Man- you guys are going to make for some difficult judging I might have to do an honorable mention in addition to the winner.

[Horsefeathers]

“Pipe smoking is the most protracted of all forms of tobacco consumption. It may explain why pipe smokers are generally regarded as patient men–and philosophers.”
-Jerome E. Brooks, from The Mighty Leaf, Tobacco Through the Centuries

[c.ortiz108]

The pipe, with solemn interposing puff,
Makes half a sentence at a time enough;
The dozing sages drop the drowsy strain,
Then pause, and puff -- and speak, and pause again. - William Cowper (1731-1800)

[Hermit]

"It has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain when awake."
Mark Twain

[cpmcdill]

"In A Personal Record, I think, Conrad told us that it was there, in lodgings, that his career as a writer began, while he was waiting for the landlady's daughter to clear away the breakfast tray. And I can understand the scene perfectly: for it is after breakfast in London lodgings, after tea and bacon and toast, to be precise, when you are lighting your pipe and warming the slack of your breeks at a miniscule warmth of coals, that one can feel most easily the flowing movement of mind that presages authorship."
--Christopher Morley, The Romany Stain

[cbr310]

"When I light up my pipe, everyone in the house goes upstairs. This is when it gets calm with peace and quiet, and me and my old friend recliner can reunite." ~ cbr310

[Basment_Shaman]

"they'll have to pry my pipe from my 93-year-old paws" Mouse 4/5/15

[c.ortiz108]

“Let your boat of life be light, packed with only what you need - a homely home and simple pleasures, one or two friends, worth the name, someone to love and someone to love you, a cat, a dog, and a pipe or two, enough to eat and enough to wear, and a little more than enough to drink; for thirst is a dangerous thing.” - Jerome K. Jerome

I think is my favorite so far.

[Nature]

When I would find myself caught in a traffic jam, I would curse at the situation and the idiot drivers that were causing it. Now when I find myself in a delay, I sigh and say "I wish I had packed a bigger pipe."

-- Nature 2015

[cpmcdill]

"After dinner Dad would light his briarwood pipe, the smoke curling about his head and drifting in blue layers up to the fake Chippendale mirror, blending with smells of roast beef and gravy. Presently he would pick up the thread again, expounding upon his theory that all kids should be put on ice until they were twenty-one."
--Shirley MacLaine